Percentage of the new interns that are still here: 100
~
Our corresponding surprise, also as a percentage: 96
~
People we saw seated and eating popcorn Cinemaxx-style at the Albert Pla concert at Barts: 7
~
Elderly chaps stopping to tell us that the fruit box we used as a newspaper stand in front of the office was more original than our new cocktail trolly
(a gift from Ferran Capo): 2
~
Increase in people picking up the newspaper now that it’s laid out on said trolly with a pretty plant next to it:
~ 20%
~
Price of our new A1 poster saying “Don’t work for assholes. Don’t work with assholes.”: 10€
~
Illustrators that sent their submission in late because they spent all weekend at Utopia’s illustration market: 2
~
New illustrators on board: 1
~
New editors in the pipeline: 1
~
Number of photos taken for the stop-motion animation of our logo: 30 (exactly one bounce)
~
Number of lights needed for the mini-studio we’re setting up at the back of the office to kick up some dust with version 2.0 of the News Desk: 3
~
Total cost of recommended professional studio lights in euros: 1.300
~
Total cost of the cheapest “option” on Amazon (read: the devil): 65
~
Hours spent searching for something in the middle: 25
~
Amount in euros those hours should be worth: 500
~
Number of words on a Dr. Bronner’s soap bottle: 3000
~
Number of words in this month’s feature aka temazo: 2.100
~
Reading time: 1 relaxed loo visit
~
Times we visited the dark web: 0
~
Times we stepped into dog shit: 0
~
Times staff members went to the gym: 0
